ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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