summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
