I want to have your abortion
her vagine was all disorganized.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
