it's like iHOP with fire
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
