I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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