doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
