3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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