I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize
