Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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