Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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