you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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