guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
