I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
He kissed a someone with a penis
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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