is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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