And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
