So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize