He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
