After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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