this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
