I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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