ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
sarcasm needs its own font
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
