is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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