I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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