i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
