so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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