do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
