we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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