I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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