I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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