thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
