Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
