We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
