Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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