So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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