dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
NoShamevember. You game?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
