The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
