I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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