found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize