I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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