Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
