then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
