what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
