you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
