we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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