DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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