i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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