If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize
