OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
