quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Randomize
