i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
